


Paralyzed

by DrawingDarkness



Series: 🌊 William Ocean Hargrove 🌊 [1]
Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Abusive Neil Hargrove, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Billy Hargrove & Maxine "Max" Mayfield Have a Good Relationship, Billy Hargrove Being an Asshole, Billy Hargrove Is Bad at Feelings, Billy Hargrove Lives, Billy Hargrove Needs a Hug, Billy Hargrove Redemption, Billy Hargrove Tries to Be a Better Person, Child Abuse, Child Neglect, Childhood Trauma, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Fluff and Angst, Gay Billy Hargrove, Hurt Billy Hargrove, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, It’s Harringrove if you squint, M/M, Monster Billy Hargrove, Neil Hargrove's A+ Parenting, Not Beta Read, Past Abuse, Past Child Abuse, Post-Season/Series 03, Protective Billy Hargrove, There’s gonna be more!, They are going to, Well - Freeform, but i promise, eventually
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-20
Updated: 2021-01-24
Packaged: 2021-03-18 11:22:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 18,716
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28866222
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DrawingDarkness/pseuds/DrawingDarkness
Summary: “Hey mom, I think I found something.” Susan stood up, pushing her glasses up into her hair. Max reached in the space left by the absent drawer, tugging the folder free. She straightened up, eyes wide as she read the neat handwriting on the small tab that jutted out further beyond the papers that were stuffed in it.William.“Who’s William…?” Max handed the file off, following her Mother over to that old armchair. Susan sat down, crossing her legs and quickly flicking the file open. Her glasses perched back on her nose as she scanned the first few documents. “Mom? Does Neil have like, another kid or something?” Susan shook her head, flipping a page over and reading the next.“Well, this changes things.”{ Completed! }
Relationships: Billy Hargrove & Maxine "Max" Mayfield, Billy Hargrove & Steve Harrington, Billy Hargrove/Steve Harrington
Series: 🌊 William Ocean Hargrove 🌊 [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2118474
Comments: 21
Kudos: 73





	1. The Purple Folder

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone! I'm back with a new fic that low and behold is actually completed! This is one of my cake fics, meaning I came up with an idea but I let another author use the same idea but produce something a little bit different! So, if you are interested my good friend Sam has a fic based on this idea! I definitely recommend that you go check it out as it's a good favorite of mine. 
> 
> ✨Link to Sam's fic✨: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25464118
> 
> Please read carefully over the chapter summary as they will warn you of some triggering topics. This story is rated as mature, as there will be no detailed sex scenes as of yet, but there are rather triggering topics discussed as well as situations where homophobia and racism will be written. I am a young adult and am comfortable talking about certain mature/triggering topics.  
> Know that as the author of this story I DO NOT SUPPORT any acts of homophobia, racism, or non-consensual acts. 
> 
> Also, these characters do belong to the Stranger Things franchise.
> 
> I do hope you guys enjoy this and the portrayal of the characters :)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Susan is searching and Max finds what she happens to be looking for. 
> 
> But, who is William Ocean Hargrove exactly?
> 
> CHAPTER WARNINGS:  
> Mentions of character death, mentions of past child abuse.
> 
> Chapter edited on March 10th 2021! Fixed up a few details and some spelling errors, let me know if you find anymore and I’ll fix them :)

Max let her head fall back into a long dramatic groan in hopes of finally snagging her mother’s attention. It hadn’t worked five minutes ago, and it also hadn’t worked five minutes before that, and the first five minutes before the second five minutes. Her back was starting to hurt from lying awkwardly on the carpet. It was a Friday afternoon, 4:03 pm to be exact, the clock on the wall ticked away as if to mock her. 

The redhead already knew that her radio was crackling in her room down the hall, she rolled her eyes at the thought, glancing over to her mother who was still quietly sifting through papers. Her baby blues slowly scanned each document through her delicate red-rimmed reading glasses. Max was supposed to be at the arcade by now, she had told Lucas she’d be no later than four o’clock. It was now 4:04 pm. 

She groaned again. Thumping her arms against the carpet as her eyes bore into her mother begging for her to notice the time and let her go. There was no point in her even being here, it’s not like she knew what any of Neil’s useless work jargon meant. She was more just in the way, her time probably better spent at whipping Dustins ass and taking his top spot from him for the fifth time this month.

Max let out another grunt as she pushed herself up.

“Maxine, please, you know we have to do this.” Her mother is currently perched on Neil’s rickety old leather chair in the corner of the room. They were in his office space, it had been almost eleven months since the events of that horrid Hawkins Fourth of July. Neil had been booted from the now Mayfield house back in mid-December, just before the start of Christmas break. Six days before Doctor Owens dropped a still healing Billy Hargrove off an hour before Christmas Day. 

It’s May fourth now, and her mom had just started getting rid of whatever had been left of Neil’s things. First, it was the garage and the shed outback, the storm cellar, then what used to be a shared bedroom now belonged to her mother. Then it came to the office, a locksmith had been called to come and remove the locks off Billy’s door and the office door. The whole situation was messy, what it came down to was her mom finally losing her shit on Neil for finally losing his shit on Billy for dropping a mug. Max shuddered remembering the way Neil had him pinned to the wall by his hair. She never really heard her mom scream before, she hardly raised her voice at either of them. 

Then, of course, things got messy. Billy ended up killing Neil. Ripped him up into little tiny pieces in the backyard. The government had swept him away for six days, pulling strings here and there to cover up Neil’s sudden demise. The town’s local paper said it was some freak animal attack, probably some rabies-infected mountain lion had attacked her poor old stepfather while he was taking out the garbage. 

“Mom I promised the party I’d be at the arcade four minutes ago! I have to skate there and it’s going to take me forever at this rate.” Max grumbled out while thumping back down to the floor, tossing her wild hair out of her face. She glared over at her mom, pulling at the carpet fibers with a snort. 

“Max, please. I know you want to go hang out with those boys, but a little extra time with your mother isn’t going to kill you. I’ll tell Billy when he gets home to let you stay a little later. I’ll push dinner back since it’s the weekend, or we can order pizza in.” Her mother smiled up at her, Max sighed, it was a good compromise. 

“Fine, but what are you even looking for, I thought the lawyer said he’d look through all of this junk.” The younger got to her feet, looking around at all of the paper scattered about. “Why can’t we just throw it all out? Or shred it or something.” Her mom sighed, setting the papers down on the edge of the desk, finished and clearly not what she was looking for. Susan looked around, pushing herself up from the chair. 

“Well, some of it the lawyer can handle, but I’m more interested to see what he was so careful to hide in here. Not to mention I have seen nothing with Billy’s name on it.” Max circled around to Neil's desk, yanking open the drawers and digging around to see if Neil had a snack drawer like some of her teachers. Dustin and Lucas both taught her that most of the teachers they had for their shared classes, had snack drawers. They mostly were the drawers to the left, closest to the windows. _Easy pickings_ they called it.

“It’s just so odd, there are no records of Billy anywhere, no social security number, no hospital records, no police reports, no school records or vaccination records! It’s like Neil just, never even had a child.” Susan shook her head, looking around the room once more, she had already emptied out all the locked file cabinets by the time Max got home from school. 

“Maybe Billy’s real Mom has them, back in California,” Max suggested, moving onto the next drawer to poke through. The drawer stuck about halfway through, she rolled her eyes and yanked on the drawer again trying to get it to unstick. Her teeth ground together in irritation, she gripped both sides of the drawer, planting her feet, took a deep breath, and yanked as hard as she could. Max let out a gasp in surprise as the drawer popped free and she flew back. Landing flat on her ass, the drawer's contents flew all over the floor. Susan was by her side helping her up, doting over her daughter to make sure she was okay. 

“Maxine please, you need to be more careful you could have gotten hurt.” Susan shook her head and started picking up the scattered pens, staples, and sticky notes. Max snorted, slowly maneuvering the drawer so she could stand up without putting it down. Once up she placed it on the desk, then crouched down to see if she damaged the drawer tracks. Her eyes widened seeing a thick purple folder hanging down. 

“Hey mom, I think I found something.” Susan stood up, pushing her glasses up into her hair. Max reached in the space left by the absent drawer, tugging the folder free. She straightened up, eyes wide as she read the neat handwriting on the small tab that jutted out further beyond the papers that were stuffed in it. 

_**William.** _

“Who’s William…?” Max handed the file off, following her Mother over to that old armchair. Susan sat down, crossing her legs and quickly flicking the file open. Her glasses perched back on her nose as she scanned the first few documents. “Mom? Does Neil have like, another kid or something?” Susan shook her head, flipping a page over and reading the next. 

“Well, this changes things.” She muttered, eyes narrowing as she continued reading. 

“What?” Max cocked her head to the side, she was getting impatient with all this ominous waiting. Her mother sighed, handing her a sheet of paper. Max was eager to snatch it up, looking over it, she found it was just a normal birth certificate. 

The top read _the State of California, Certification of Vital record._ Her eyes followed the boxes from left to right; _Name of child - First; William, Middle; Ocean, Last ( Family ); Hargrove, Sex; Male, Date of Birth MM/DD/YYYY; 04/19/1966, Hour; 0300._ Everything in the _Place of Birth_ section was covered in a layer of heavy dark ink. She moved over to the next section. _Father of Child; Neil Hargrove._ The _Mother of Child_ section was also covered in a heavy layer of the same ink. 

“Mom, is this, is this Billy’s birth certificate?” Max looked up, her mom was still flipping through papers. From where she stood Max could see more papers with dark ink covering up information. “Mom..?” 

“Max why don’t you head to the Arcade, I think I found what I needed. All of this will have to go to the lawyer, not to mention I’ll have to make some calls to make sure this paperwork is legitimate.” Susan sighed, closing the file and standing up, making her way out of the room. She glanced back. “Have fun dear, if you need any extra change grab some from my purse on your way out. I’ll see you and Billy when you get home.” Max nodded, the paper still clutched in her hand at his side. As soon as her mother disappeared in the hall, Max made a dash to her room, picking up her Walkman. Her brows furrowed as she glanced over at the clock. 

It was 4:13 pm. She was late. 

“Hey, it’s Max, I’m on my way to the arcade. Over.” She threw the Walkman down on the bed, grabbing her backpack and dumping out her school books. On second thought, she threw the walkmen in, and the birth certificate then crossed the room over to her small vanity. Grabbing the bag of quarters she’d been saving up all week.

“Max! What the hell have you been doing? Dustin is almost about to beat your Dig Dug score from last week! You better get down here! Over.” She smiled, hearing Lucas come over the channel and the shouts from the others in the background was somehow comforting. She quickly scooped her bag off the bed and strode out the door down the hallway. She hoped that El would be there at least, she and Mike had begged Hopper to let her out just this once to come and enjoy the arcade. Maybe learn a few games. 

“Max!” She turned, the front door half-open, her mom peeking out from the entrance of the kitchen, phone to her ear. “Whatever you do, don’t tell Billy, I don’t want him worked up until I know for sure. He doesn’t need the extra stress right now.” She nodded, waving her mom off as she stepped out the door, running through the porch door then down the steps. She was on her board in a few breaths, skating down the road, wind in her hair as she thought.

* * *

_How the hell do you get Billy out of William?_

* * *

It was one of the million questions that swarmed in her head. They kept Max occupied the whole skate to Hawkin’s arcade. She practically kicked down the door in search of the Party, board tucked under her arm as she weaved through the other kids and tall flashing machines. Head whipping around wildly until someone grabbed her by the shoulders and steered her to the PAC-MAN game. 

“They are over here, El and Mike are currently kicking some kids high score for one of the top three spots.” Max grinned at hearing Steve’s voice, of course, he was here, how could she have forgotten today he was buying them all Pizza? 

Mike and El were pressed up against each other while he tugged at the joystick and directed El to push buttons every so often. Lucas was by her side, fist-bumping her alongside Dustin, Will was leaning against the machine. Will gave her a small wave which she returned as she knocked her shoulder up against Lucas’.

“Took you long enough Mad Max. We thought you weren’t coming.” Max scoffed and rolled her eyes, gently punching at Lucas’ side. The boy chuckled, throwing an arm over her shoulder as they watched Mike coach El through the motions. 

“Sorry it took me so long, my mom is still dealing with Neil’s crap. Are we sitting for pizza soon?” She glanced around seeing that Steve had already vanished. 

“Yeah, Steve will be back with it soon. Is your mom cooking something gross? You are like never this excited for pizza unless it’s for D&D.” Max sighed, her grip on her backpack strap tightening. Lucas looked at her in confusion, eyes filled with worry. “Max, what is it?”   
  
The Party all turned their attention to her, the _GAME OVER_ block letters flashed on the screen, illuminating the worry in Mike’s eyes, and the confusion in El’s. They all had one thing on their mind; The Upside Down and the Mindflayer.

“It’s about Billy.” She gnawed at her lip, the mystery of the folder still sitting at the front of her mind. “We’ll talk about it later, I want to kick Dustin’s ass at Dig Dug first. Show El how it’s done.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How are we feeling about this chapter? Please let me know your thoughts! Let's have a conversation!  
> You can find me on Tumblr @Drawing-and-Darknes / on Twitter @DreadnSunflower 18+ Twitter is where I am most active, I run polls for some fics, so if you want to get involved with what I write next follow me there! 
> 
> Hopefully, I can get some more work done on Come&Go as well as Peanut Butter Waffles, haven't read them? Go check them out!
> 
> Comments & Kudos are GREATLY appreciated!


	2. Maxine & William

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max can’t help but drop a bomb while she’s angry, and Steve tries his best to diffuse it before it can cause damage.
> 
> Steve really should have driven them home. 
> 
> CHAPTER WARNINGS:  
> Strong language, hints at abuse, sibling tension/fighting, mentions of character death, Max needs to learn how to look both ways before crossing and Billy just being a fucking dickhead, at this point it’s his love language and he really needs to take a “how to express your love language properly with out hurting people” class :’)
> 
> Chapter edited on March 12th 2021! Fixed up a few details and some spelling errors, let me know if you find anymore and I’ll fix them :)

“Okay so, let me get this straight. Billy’s name is actually _William_?” Steve mumbled between bites of pizza, everyone staring down at the now slightly crumpled piece of paper face up in the middle of the table. 

“His middle name is Ocean? Like, after the actual word Ocean..?” Dustin chimed in, snatching the paper up. “Damn, look at that Steve! It say’s Ocean!” 

“Dustin put that down! You’re gonna get grease marks on it.” Steve snapped, he pulled the paper from Dustin’s fingers and passed it back to Max. “So what you’re telling us is that Billy’s dad had this folder of all of his information, including this birth certificate, had been hidden above a drawer? All secret agent style or something?” Steve sighed as the redhead nodded while folding the paper up, and wedging it under her plate. 

“Why does that even matter? It’s just a birth certificate.” Mike grumbled, head leaning on his hand bored of the conversation. “It’s not like it’s our business.” 

“Mike, it’s clear that his dad hid it from him.” Most of the heads turned to Lucas. His arms crossed, pizza untouched as he leaned backed. “I mean, who marks out where you were born and the whole mom section is blacked out. Who does that? Why would Neil do that?” Eyes shifted to Max, she sat quietly staring at her plate. She sighed, shaking her head.   
  


“Mike does have a point though, it really isn’t our business.” Will mumbled through a bite of pizza.   
  


“Well?” Dustin tossed a crumpled up straw wrapper over at Max, an eyebrow raised.

“It’s not really my business to say.” The boys all seemed to groan in unison, Mike standing up stating he was off to the washroom, Dustin on his heels. Lucas patted Max on the back with a soft _‘I understand’_ and followed. El moved up close to her, grabbing her hand and giving it a reassuring squeeze. She sighed, letting her head drop to the brunette’s shoulder. 

“What are we gonna do Steve? Billy has been so distant since.... Since he got back from the lab. When he’s not being distant he’s being a dick.” She chewed at her lip, fingers now fidgeting around with the straw wrapper.

“I don’t really know. I guess the best you can do is just be there for him,” Steve sighed, dropping his half eaten slice and leaning back against the booth seat. “I mean we both know Billy isn’t much of a talker when it comes to his feelings. Not to mention he handed my ass to me, so we weren’t really friends.” Steve shrugged, running a hand through his hair. Max could see the leftover grease on his hand leaving a shiny trail. “I’ll keep an eye out for him though. See if I can get him talking, and less dickish.” 

“Just try not to get beat up again okay? I really don’t want to see what happens when I try and smash his nuts with your bat.” Steve huffed, nodding as he took a bite of pizza. “I just want him to be happy, but I think this might freak him out more. Billy has never talked about his mother, what if this brings her up? What if he leaves to go find her like El did or something?” She glanced over at El, squeezing her hand in apology. 

“Well, according to the paper,” The brunette gestured toward the birth certificate with the slice of pepperoni in his hand. “Billy is eighteen, almost nineteen. According to law if I remember correctly he is an adult and is free to do what he wants, so if he wants to go try and find her you can’t really stop him. The only thing he can’t do is drink in bars or buy liquor now.” Steve sighed, popping the last bits of crust in his mouth. 

“What?” Max stared blankly at the teen, who stared blankly back. “What does beer have to do with anything?” 

“They changed the drinking age, it’s not eighteen anymore, they upped it to twenty one. Like, how stupid is that?” Max glanced over to El, who looked just as confused as she was. They both looked back at Steve who was slurping on his straw out of boredom. “What?” 

“Are all boys like this?” El questioned quietly, sending Max into a fit of giggles and Steve rolling his eyes. “Even Mike?”

“Space cadets? Yeah pretty much, and yes, even Mike. He’s just mean.” El smiled, squeezing the redhead’s hand, happy to see her smiling rather than frowning like she had been most of the day. Max shook her head, she looked over Steve’s shoulder in search of the other boys, only to find her brother approaching. Her eye’s wide. “Steve what time is it?” 

“Uh, it’s ten after six. Why?” Steve turned to look behind him, head following Billy as he approached the table. “Huh, you’re early.” 

“Max, let’s go.” Billy had her bag slung over his shoulder, and her bord tucked under his arm. His hood was up, covering up his hair, or what he liked to say what was left of it. Max frowned, he was still hiding underneath all those clothes. 

“Mom said I could stay-” She started, only to be cut off. 

“Bullshit, let’s go, I don’t want to be late for dinner. Say bye and let’s bounce, we are already late.” His voice was low, eyes narrowed down at her. “I really don’t want to repeat myself Max, today isn’t a good day.” The redhead huffed, quickly pulling El into a hug. Her eye’s never flinched away from her brother’s stern stare. It would be easier to just explain in the car, he hated being out longer than he needed to be. As Max tried to pull away, El suddenly gripped her tight.

“Be patient with him, he’s trying. He’s scared, like I was when I first got out.” The girl whispered in her ear, low enough that Max barely heard it. She nodded, patting El’s shoulder in signal that she understood. She pulled away and moved out of the booth, she gave Steve a quick hug.  
  
“Are you coming or what?” The blond growled, she could see him shifting on his feet. He was getting restless. Which annoyed her, it had been months and he still hadn’t gotten any better at being out in public without almost flipping his lid if someone looked at him the wrong way. If anything Max thought it was getting worse, so she was going to make him wait a few more minutes. “ _Maxine.”_

“I’m waiting for my friends so I can say goodbye to them, _William._ So go wait in the car if you don’t like all the eye’s on you. _”_ She grit out through clenched teeth, as much as she wanted to be patient, he really knew how to piss her off. Steve caught her eye, his jaw clenched as he passed her the now folded up birth certificate. 

“What did you just call me?” Billy’s voice was louder, more of a demand than a question. Max whipped around, the paper clutched tightly in her hand. They both stared at each other, fire in their eyes. 

“Max, don’t say something you will regret. Remember you said it wasn’t our business. Which goes for you too.” Steve mumbled, his body relaxed in the booth, though his jaw was clenched, and fingers twitching. The tension that was building was starting to become explosive. He knew that Billy and Max could be like oil and water. They always seemed to be butting heads, this time was no exception. 

“Stay out of it Harrington.” Blue eyes sent a sharp warning that was clear, _this is between us, not you. Back off._ The brunette nodded, he understood and threw his hands up in a mild surrender. 

“Don’t snap at him, he’s just trying to help. We all are just trying to help you but you are too fucking stubborn to see it.” Max crossed her arms, she could feel the paper crumpling in her grip. 

“Maxine, lower your voice, you are making a scene.” Billy hissed out, baring his teeth in a silent snarl. 

“No I’m not! You are the one making the scene, _William._ Maybe if you pulled your head out of your ass you’d realize it’s not me that is the issue. It’s not Steve, or Dustin, or Mike or Lucas or Will, it’s always you that has to be a dickhead for no reason. It’s not my fault we left California-“ 

“Max that’s enough, don’t talk to him that way.” Max whipped her head over to Steve, he was standing behind her, he gently placed a hand on her shoulder. “It’s okay, just take a deep breath and go home. I can always pick you up tomorrow to hang out with the party-” 

“No! It’s not fair that he gets to be rude all the time to me-” She tried to counter back, only to be silenced by Steve’s glare. 

“Max, I get he is an ass sometimes, but right now you need to open your eyes and see that you yelling at him right now is making this worse.” Steve jerked his chin toward the younger teen, Max followed his line of sight, her breath catching in her throat as she saw the black veins starting to creep their way up his neck. Billy’s chest was heaving, he was struggling to keep it together. Steve was right, him freaking out in public was not a good idea.

“I get that you don’t like that he bosses you around, you just have to pick your battles right now,” She felt the brunette flick the paper clutched in her hand. “Neither of you will win this one if you drop that bomb here. It’s his business, not anyone else’s.” 

“ **Fine** , tell Lucas I’ll see him tomorrow.” Max stomped away, brushing past Billy with a huff. The blond watched as she pushed the arcade door open and headed down the street.He glanced back at Steve, lip twitching as the brunette stared back, hands on his hips. 

“What the fuck was that about Harrington?”

“Nothing man.” with Steve’s response Billy shifted on his heel, heading out the door to follow Max. 

* * *

“What the fuck is your problem today.” He growled out as he caught up to her.

“Nothing.”

“Clearly it’s not, and what the hell is with you calling me William? You and your nerd herd decide to give me a new name or something?” Max snorted, shaking her head and stomping ahead of him. “Jesus is this your revenge for me calling you Maxine? Maybe if you listened, _Maxine_ , we wouldn’t have to fight all the time. We could actually get home ontime.” 

“Where is the car?” She snapped, turning around to glare at him. Billy stopped, his grip on her board tightening. “Hello, earth to Billy, where is your car.” 

“Home. It’s a nice day out, so I figured we could walk. Fresh air and shit.” He shrugged, chewing at the inside of his cheek. The truth was that he wasn’t ready to drive, not yet. Being behind the wheel still brough that skin crawling sensation, and flashes of Nancy Wheeler. He really didn’t trust his body to obey him. He didn’t want to risk it. 

“Fine, let’s go then.” She quipped out, picking up her pace. She needed space, Billy always knew how to push her buttons just the right way. Not to mention he hadn’t started calling her Maxine since he’d come back from the lab. It was annoying her to the point she was ready to freak out. She didn’t get it, how after dying he could still be such an ass. 

They walked in silence for about twenty minutes, Max a few steps ahead, the paper still clutched tightly in her hand. Billy a few steps behind, fingers clenching and unclenching to try and ground himself. He almost slipped in the arcade, that was bad news. Really bad news. Not to mention Max was starting to be a bitch again, falling back into the familiar motions. It made his skin prickle with irritation. They were about to cross the intersection, just as Max stepped off the curb, that cold tingling crept up his spine, he instinctively reached out, grabbing her by the back of her shirt, yanking her back into his chest. 

“Billy what the hell! Let go of me!” She yelled, struggling against his grip. 

“Max, just stop for a second-” She pulled free, instantly booking it straight into the road, Billy felt his stomach drop as a car came whipping around the corner, thundering down the road with no signs of stopping, “MAX!” He felt the cold crawl down his thighs and calves, he immediately dumped the backpack and the board, then darted into the road after her.

He could hear the tires screeching, he could smell the rubber burning against the asphalt as the driver tried to stop. The blond stretched his arms out, grabbing her around the waist and picking her up off the ground. He turned his back, his eyes screwing shut hoping that he would take most of the damage. His breath caught in his throat as he held onto her tightly, Max gripping onto him just as tight. 

“Oh heavens- are you two okay!?” Billy let go of the breath he was holding, letting Max slip down to the ground, his hands tight on her shoulders. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t see her until she was halfway in the street, thank god, my husband just had the brakes on the car replaced- Oh my God, please tell me you kids are okay?” Max looked up, her eyes wide as she saw the black veins that branched out across his face like decaying roots.

“Uh- yeah! We are okay! Sorry for the trouble ma’am!” Max tossed a smile and a small wave to the driver. She quickly grabbed his hand and tugged him to the side walk, as the women stood staring after them. His grip on her hand was so tight she was sure it would bruise. As soon as they stepped into the sidewalk, she gasped as she was whipped around, her wrists locked in Billy’s vice like grip. 

“ _Maxine Elizabeth Mayfield what in the fuck is wrong with you_? You could have been hurt, hell you could have _died!_ What the fuck was I supposed to tell Susan if you’d gotten hit?” He snarled down at her, the dark veins on his face seemed to squirm at his sudden outburst of anger. Max felt tears welling in her eyes and the familiar burn of embarrassment on her cheeks. She hated when he yelled at her, it wasn’t her fault, she just wanted space, and it almost got her killed. She gasped as he jostled her, his eyes boring down at her like daggers. 

“I asked you a question I expect you to fucking answer it. What the hell is going on with you today?” He snapped, letting her wrists go, he pushed her aside to grab her bag and skateboard that he’d dropped. “Smarten the fuck up Maxine, the whole world doesn’t revolve around you, so figure that out and start thinking before you do things. You almost gave that woman a nightmare of PTSD and a world of hurt.” He grabbed her wrist and quickly looked both ways, crossing the small intersection he tugged the redhead along. “Today of all fucking days, I told you today was a bad day for me but you just had to keep pushing my fucking buttons. I hate that you make my life a hell of a lot harder than it needs to fucking be.” 

“Well I hate you, William Ocean Hargrove, _I hate you so fucking much_.” Billy froze, his heart almost seizing up in his chest as he turned to look down at her. “I hate you so much because I actually love you. I hate you because I love you even though you are so mean to me. I hate you because I cried so much when the Mindflayer killed you, _it fucking killed you Billy!”_ Max got the words out in a broken sob, she couldn’t look at him so instead she just stared at his chest. Right where she knew that big scar was. “I hate that you left us, _you left me,_ and even when we tried to help you when you were flayed you still were so fucking mean. You called me a bitch- _you hit me-_ “ Max sighed with relief when his grip on her fell away, she closed her eyes and brought her hands up to wipe as many of the tears away as she could. 

“Even after all that, Even with how much I hate you- I can’t hide the truth from you because it feels wrong-“ She reached into her pocket and fished out the birth certificate. Max didn’t remember when she had folded it up and jammed it in her pocket. Her hands were shaking as she unfolded it, it was crumpled in a few spots. “Here, it’s yours. Mom has more paperwork at the house. We found it in Neil’s office.” She mumbled, her lungs fluttering trying to recover from the sobs she’d let out a few moments before. Max held it out to him, Billy gently took it. 

A few moments passed, she watched as Billy looked it over. The black veins started to recede, slowly back tracking as Billy pulled his hood down. His curls were sad to look at, he hadn’t done much with his hair since coming back. It was weird to see him without the mullet. Max remembered how the back length had just barely reached his shoulders when they first met. 

The longer time stretched out, the more she began to fidget. She was worried how he’d react, what would happen, if anything, Max was worried that Billy would leave. 

“You said mom has the rest of it.. The paperwork?” Max sniffled, nodding, eyes wide as her brain tried to process the fact he’d said _mom._ “Okay. Let’s go home.” He muttered, folding the birth certificate and tucking it into his hoodie pocket. Max flinched when he grabbed her hand, he gently pulled her along the sidewalk. “Let’s go home Max.” His voice was shaking slightly, his fingers tightened gently around her hand. She squeezed back. 

“Billy…?” 

“Hm?” 

“I don’t hate you. I’m sorry.” She whispered quietly, drying what was left of her tears with her sleeve. 

“I know. I’m sorry too.” His voice was quiet, if he asked, she would have denied the fact she could hear that he was crying. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How are we feeling about this chapter? Please let me know your thoughts! Let's have a conversation!  
> You can find me on Tumblr @Drawing-and-Darknes / on Twitter @DreadnSunflower 18+ Twitter is where I am most active, I run polls for some fics, so if you want to get involved with what I write next follow me there! 
> 
> Hopefully, I can get some more work done on Come&Go as well as Peanut Butter Waffles, haven't read them? Go check them out!
> 
> Comments & Kudos are GREATLY appreciated!


	3. The Promise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More Billy & Max arguing/bonding, some Susan & Billy bonding, memories, bad feelings, and some slight monster Billy action.
> 
> CHAPTER WARNINGS: Billy gets pretty hands on with Max in this chapter, so I am going to mark it as abusive behaviour toward a minor & Billy just being a fucking dickhead in general.
> 
> Chapter edited on March 12th 2021! Fixed up a few details and some spelling errors, let me know if you find anymore and I’ll fix them :)

“Billy?” Max gently knocked on his door, it had been two days since he’d found out. Two days since she saw tears in his eyes. Two days since she saw how white his knuckles were from gripping that thin blue paper. Two days since she had screamed that she hated him. Two days since she admitted she hated him so much that she loved him. Two days since they’d both apologized. He hadn’t come out of his room, hadn’t gone to work, hadn’t even come out to eat. He hasn’t said a word to either of them. 

She tried again, her knock less hesitant and more firm, “Hey, I’m coming in okay?” As she twisted the knob, the door popped open a few inches before stopping. Max glanced up, her eyes wide seeing the black of Billy’s fingertips against the harsh black and brown of sharp nails that were digging into the wood of the door.

“Go away.” It was a firm command, it sent her stomach to her feet and her left wrist aches with phantom pain alongside the memories of what Billy was like before the Mindflayer. 

“Billy c’mon, Mom is worried about you, I’m worried about you!” She tried pushing at the door, only making it creak in protest. “You can’t just vanish into your room like this, mom wants to call Doctor Owens back because she thinks-“ 

“Why can’t you two just leave me alone?” The door flew open, Max gasped as all her force no longer had a barrier to hold her up. She stumbled forward right into Billy’s chest, her head jerking up to stare at him as she felt his hands wrap around her wrists tightly. The pressure hurt, she could feel his nails digging into her skin. 

“Billy-“ 

“Why do you even give a fuck? Why Max? I’m not your brother, I’m not related to you in any way, not to mention you’ve seen the things I’ve done to people- to your friends-“ 

“Billy that wasn’t your fault! It was the Mindflayer-“ 

“Don’t try and blame the shadow for what I did to Heather, To the Holloway’s, to Neil!” Max felt herself trembling in his grip, she could feel a few pinpricks in her wrist, her eyes locked with stormy grey-blue eyes filled with tar-like tears. 

“Oh my god, Billy what is going on? I thought you said your therapy appointment was going well? Please tell me you still don’t blame yourself-“ she yelped feeling him push her back and jerk her forward. It made her head hurt, and her wrists tense up with pain. 

“Jesus fuck stop fucking worrying about me. There is no fucking point in worrying about some psychopath like me.” He snarled the words out while more black tears dropped down, staining his cheeks. It looked like when her mom had bawled her eyes out after finding Neil’s torn apart body in the backyard, she remembered her mom rushing and snatching the blanket off the couch. Billy had been covered head to toe in blood, he was laughing while Susan sobbed, laughing while Hopper and Owen’s had taken him away to get checked. Max huffed at the memory, shaking her head and kicking at his calf in an effort to get him to let go, she tried tugging her wrists free. It was useless, Billy had gotten a hell of a lot stronger since the Mindflayer. 

“I don’t get why you and Susan have to pussyfoot around it. You barely know anything about me. You don’t know what I’ve gone through, what I’ve done to people.” His grip was tightening on her, it was starting to hurt more than it should. His eyes were dark, she could see black veins creeping down his neck. 

“Billy please- You’re hurting me-”

“You just don’t fucking get it, do you, Max? The satisfaction I felt when I ripped Neil’s stupid face off _with my teeth._ The satisfaction I felt when _I hit you_ when we were at Starcourt. The satisfaction I felt when _it fucking chose me to go after all of you.”_ Billy sneered down at her, she looked up, tears dripping down her cheeks as those blue eyes looked more black then they should have from his tears. “I liked what I was doing, I liked the fact I had power, that I could have done anything I fucking wanted-”

“Then why didn’t you?” Billy stopped, his brows furrowed in confusion. Max felt his grip on her loosen, her teeth ground together keeping her from crying more as she ripped her hand’s free. Billy’s claws slicing into her skin as she did, drawing blood. She didn’t back down, her voice trembling as she continued, “If you had all that power, why didn’t you fucking kill Neil then? Why didn’t you drag him out of bed, like when he did to you, why didn’t you beat his face in, or kick him so hard his ribs broke.” Max felt like she was going to puke, her fists clenched at her sides as she stared up at Billy. She could feel the blood from her wrists dripping down onto the carpet. “Stop making it out like you did it because you wanted to. You didn’t Billy, the Mindflayer possessed you, it manipulated you just like it did Will! So none of this is your fault!”

 _“Yes, it fucking is.”_ Billy snarled, she could see him trying to straighten up, she could see his defenses starting to go up like she was Neil yelling at him. He was scared. 

“Billy, it is not your fault. It’s mine. Do you want to know how I know that? Because you cried like a fucking baby when we locked you in the sauna, El watched you cry when she went looking for you, you stepped in front of a fucking monster for god’s sake!” Max took a breath, then stepped forward, quickly wrapping her arms around his waist and held on as tight as she could. She could feel his ribs shifting, his skin moving, he was going to fall apart again and Max wasn’t going to let that happen. “You stopped it from hurting us, you had nothing but your hands and you gave us enough time to close the gate. It’s my fault we didn’t notice sooner that the Mindflayer got you. It’s my fault that I ignored it, that I ignored you, because of that you got possessed and you had to take all those people. That’s on me.” She squeezed him, burying her face into his chest while trying to hold back the second wave of tears. 

“Billy I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I should have been there for you, I should have noticed it sooner. I told them it couldn’t be you. I didn’t want anyone getting hurt again, but I let you get hurt. Please just fucking talk to me, I don’t want them to take you away again.” Max gasped as she was yanked away by her hair, being pulled toward the door, she reached up to try and get his hand off her. Her fingers meeting cold hard flesh, it rippled under her touch.

“Get out, get the fuck out, don’t come anywhere near my room no matter what you hear, do you understand me?” His voice sounded off, all gravely and more of a growl than actual words. Max hit the ground, her hair obscuring her sight as she quickly pushed herself up immediately turning around only to have the door slammed in her face. She was up, pushing her hair out of the way and banging on Billy’s door. 

“Billy what’s going on- Don’t fucking lock me out just because you don’t want to talk! We have to fucking talk about this shit!” 

“ _Max for the love of God we will just fucking give me a second- I need a second to calm down- I-”_ The snarl that came from the other side of the door made Max’s stomach drop, she covered her mouth and dropped to her knees as she realized what was happening. It was the same thing that happened before they found Neil. Her eyes never left the door, even when she heard things being thrown, the door cracked as something smashed into it. She didn’t move, not an inch from where she was sitting, even when what sounded like a mini Demogorgon had been set loose in her brother’s bedroom. 

* * *

What seemed like hours seemed to pass, Max’s legs had started to cramp, so she moved to sit with her back against the wall across from Billy’s door. She almost went in, when she was sure the sound coming from behind the door was billy crying, or screaming. Sometimes she couldn’t tell because it was so drowned out with snarls and growls, it made her sick thinking about how what lurked behind the door in front of her was Billy. She wondered what he looked like, her mom refused to say anything to Dr. Owens and Hopper, but Max knew she saw whatever had ripped out of Billy’s skin to tear Neil apart.

It had quieted down in the last ten minutes, the only sounds seemed to be the clock from further down the hallway. It was starting to make her nervous, what if Billy got out? She most likely would have heard him, but it was still something to worry about with the deafening silence. She slowly stood up, wiping whatever leftover tears from her eyes and cheeks while she crossed the hallway, pressing her ear up against the door. Max held her breath, closing her eyes to try and focus on picking up any sound that might be coming from inside. After a few moments, she moved her head away, hands still pressed flat against the door. She took a few deep breaths, trying to calm down, get her heartbeat under control, after she finished her fourth exhale, she reached for the doorknob. Bringing her other hand to knock gently, once, twice, and a third time before twisting the handle. The door groaned as she slowly pushed it open, it caught on something, leaving her about a foot of space to wiggle through. 

The room was dark but light enough from the window that she could see the holes in the drywall, and the claw marks that lined the top of the walls. The little bedroom was a wreck, clothing tossed everywhere, dresser drawers upturned, some smashed into nothing but splinters. The closet door was broken into a few pieces, laying scattered across the room. Her eyes finally landed on Billy, sitting in the middle of it all, shirt barely hanging on by threads, she could see some of the scarred over puncture wounds the Mindflayer had left after Starcourt. 

“Billy?”

“Careful, I- I think I threw something that was glass over there.” Max huffed, carefully picking her way over to the blond. She winced when she stepped on a shattered cologne bottle, causing a few more shards to crack underneath her added weight. She kicked a few clothes and other broken items out of the way, clearing enough space to sit down beside him. Billy had his head down, his hair hanging covering most of his face, in his hands she could see the wrinkled birth certificate. He turned his head to look over at her, she could see claw marks that sliced deeply into his face. Max sighed, snagging what looked like one of his band shirts, now shredded into nothing but strips of fabric. She held the fabric out to him, he huffed taking it from her and wiping the blood off his face. With the blood cleared, she could see his skin slowly knitting itself back together.

“Are you okay?” 

“I don’t know.” 

“Billy.”  
  
“Max fucking drop it would you? I don’t know okay, this, all of this,” he held up the paper, gestured to himself and then to the room that was in shambles around them, “Is all just too much for me to fucking think about.” He sighed, tossing the paper aside, resting his mangled face on one of his hands with a growl. “You and Susan finding my birth certificate, just, it just pushed me over the edge again.” He shook his head, tossing the now blood soaked fabric a few feet in front of them. “I’m at my fucking limit right now, the last two day’s I’ve been trying to calm down but I fuking can’t because you and Susan have to come knocking every twenty damn minutes.” His voice was dipping back into a snarl. 

“Because we are worried about you dipshit, or did you forget that I watched you die? Did you forget that when we got you back you did nothing but sit in here. So is it really that annoying to you that we just want to make sure that you are okay?” Max snapped at him, only to be met by a snarl. 

“Oh yeah fucking right, like either of you gave a shit when Neil was laying into me every friday night for something you did.” Billy stood, pulling his sweatpants back over his hips and retying the strings. “Like you fucking gave a shit when you and all of your little fucking friends tossed fireworks down at me.” Billy turned and headed for the door, Max hopped up to follow him, she could feel her face heating up with anger. “It took me fucking dying for you all to give a shit about me. I was better off in the government's custody, at least I could keep my lid on there.” 

“We tried to help you, it’s not my fault you’re stubborn and an asshole. You made it really fucking hard for us to give a shit about you.”  
  
“Right because everything is my fault Max! Guess it was my fault that I got _forcibly face fucked by a pile of rat jam._ Then sent out to kidnap people and try and kill your little friend. Definitely my fault right?” Billy stormed down the hall, ripping the rest of his shirt off as he went. Max was quick to pick up the scraps he left and dump them in the hamper as Billy wrenched the washroom door open so hard it popped off the hinges. Sending screws flying. Billy threw back his head in a groan and a _are you fucking kidding me? Again?_ He shoved Max out of the way as he leaned the door on the wall across from where it should be hanging. “Max why are you following me? It’s annoying.”  
  
“I said I wanted to talk, because clearly we need to. For the record, had you not been going to do the nasty with Mike’s mom maybe we wouldn’t have had to throw fireworks at you. Maybe you could have been throwing the fireworks with us.” She threw up her arms with a huff, following him into the washroom and flicking on the light. Billy was already rummaging through the medicine cabinet above the toilet while she crouched down to get the first aid kit.  
  
“Doing the nasty? Really? What is saying sex to gross for you? Weird, because I’m pretty sure I caught you with your tongue down Lucas’ throat at the arcade last week.” Billy laughed as Max slammed the kit down glaring at him. She popped it open, pulling out the peroxide and a few bandages. 

“You are such a fucking dickhead.”  
  
“And you are such a little bitch.” Max rolled her eyes, leaning against the counter and popping the cap on the peroxide, Billy slumped down on the toilet seat, snatching the glass off the vanity and taking a swig.  
  
“Whatever you say, _William.”_ The blond shot her a death stare, lip twitching up into a sneer.  
  
“Sure thing, _Maxine.”_ Max stared at him, lips drawn into a thin line as they stared off. Stormy blues and bright blues at war with each other. “See, not so fuckin’ cute is it?” He growled, top lip twitching in irritation. He slid the small pain killer container over to her. “Let me see your wrists, bring the peroxide and some of the tensor wrap.” Max sighed, digging through the first aid kit and pulling out the tensor wrap then making her way toward him. He grabbed her hand and yanked her closer. 

“Hey! Be careful, you already broke enough skin today so watch your claws.” Billy snorted, pouring a bit of peroxide on a cotton ball while shaking his head. “What, you know I’m right, you have claws, like a cat.” 

“More like a dog, I can’t retract them like a cat. C’mon shitbird use your brain.” Billy gently dabbed at the sliced skin, moving to the next one when he noticed her flinched at too much pressure. They stayed quiet while he worked, his grip loosening on her hand. While wrapping her wrist he looked up, seeing her lip trembling and eyes watery. “What? Why are you crying, I know for a fact it doesn’t hurt that much, it’s like a fuckin’ paper cut Max-” He was cut off as she tugged her hand free and wrapped her arms around his neck. Her breath stuttered as she tried not to cry. Billy sighed, letting his hands drop to his lap as he waited for her to calm down. Talking to Max while she was upset was useless, all it did was make things worse and her cry more. Billy hated seeing her cry. 

He wondered what upset her this time, if it was the pain from the peroxid? No, it couldn’t be that, he’d helped Max patch up her shins when he taught her to skate. Calling her by her full name? No, Neil did it all the time like an asshole, and if Billy was being honest, she called his full name first. His mind wandered, trying to figure out what it was. It couldn’t have been his room, she’d seen him throw shit, get angry, lash out at her- Oh. That might be it. 

“It’s just your wrists right? I didn’t hurt anything else?” He tried to turn his head to look at her, push her away, but she only gripped onto him tighter, burying her face into his neck while she let out a sob. “Max, c’mon, you didn’t go into my room until it was quiet, right? Max, I need to know if I actually hurt you, so stop fucking crying for a minute and tell me what’s wrong.” He managed to snake his arms up and grab her by her shoulders to gently push her out of the hug. His hands gripping her shoulders gently to steady her as she leaned back up. Wiping at her face while looking away from him. “C’mon Shitbird, what’s wrong?” 

“You haven't called me that since, since before you died, before the Byers house. I didn’t think I’d miss it that much, I didn’t think I’d miss _you_ that much you asshole.” Max sniffled between breaths, she was pretty sure she had snot all over her face. “You died Billy, I watched you get stabbed by a monster from another dimension, and I just learned that other dimensions and creatures existed the year before, and then, and then you came in and tipped everything upside down. Like you always do.” Billy chuckled, taking her wrist and finishing the wrap, then moving on to her other wrist.

“Yeah, I guess I did. Not by choice, but uh, yeah.” He sighed, grabbing a few more cotton balls and drenching them in peroxide. “I lied, about what I said earlier.” 

“I know.” Billy looked up, eyebrows raised in question.

“You are a really ugly crier, you only do that when you’re scared. So yeah, I know you lied. I know you don’t like hurting people, even if you almost killed Steve that one time.” Billy groaned, leaning back. “Yeah by the way, you should talk to him about that.”  
  
“Max, let’s not go there. I can tell you right now Steve want’s absolutely nothing to do with me.” He leaned forward looking for the other roll of tensor wrap on the vanity. Max held it up with a grin, as he reached for it she held it up higher over her head. She knew all he would have to do was stand up to retrieve it, but that didn’t stop her from trying. “Max, don’t be a brat.”  
  
“Promise then.” 

“Promise what?” Billy snapped, he stood, crowding her space trying to reach for the wrap, only to have the red-head dart into the hallway with a giggle. “Shitbird, hand it over.”  
  
“Promise me that if you won’t talk to me, or mom, you’ll talk to Steve.” Billy only got two steps in before she darted down the hall, she laughed as she went, trying her best to breathe through the snot that had built up in her sinuses from crying. She stopped by the entrance to the kitchen and looked back, a gasp ripping from her throat to see Billy barreling down the hallway with a wicked grin on his face. She let out a squeal as she turned into the kitchen, Billy almost snatching her by her hair as she dived under the table and scrambled out from between two chairs. She cleared the table and made it to the back door, fiddling with the lock she turned seeing Billy go over the table, one hand planting on the dark wood and his legs swinging over. The second his ass hit the centre of the table it cracked under his weight and he let out a startled yelp, both the table and him falling to the ground making the loudest commotion she was sure the neighbors heard. Max gasped, a hand covering her mouth as she tried not to laugh, only to burst out into full belly laughter seeing Billy pop up and look at the table, his eyes wide with shock and his laugh quickly joining hers. 

“Holy shit, Susan is gonna kill me!” Billy managed to get out between laughs, Max stepped forward offering her hand out to him, Billy taking it, and pulling her down. She screamed out as he attacked her sides tickling her. “This is totally your fault!”

“It- ohmygodstop- Billy!! Seriously- AH!! How did you know- Billystop-” Their laughter filled the space until Max managed to bring her knee up and push him away. She sat up taking in gulps of air as Billy laughed beside her. “You are such a dickhead.”  
  
“Not my fault you’re ticklish, now gimme that wrap so I can finish up your wrist.” He reached for it, Max huffed, planting her shoe on his chest and pushing him back. “Oh my god, fine, I’ll apologize to Harrington okay? Happy?”

“No, you need to talk with him. I know it’s hard for you to talk to us, but Owen’s and the Therapist said you need to try and talk to someone. Steve is perfect, he’s a boy, same age, you both can talk about gross boy stuff and Steve knows about the Upside Down, since this shit started.” Billy growled, crossing his arms and leaning against the broken half of the table while staring her down. “You know I’m right, and I don’t want to lose my brother, just because he has another mental breakdown and rips someone’s face off again.” Billy rolled his eyes and nodded, reaching for the wrap again. “Hey! I didn’t hear you promise!” 

“Fine, I promise shitbird. Happy now?” She nodded and let him snatch the wrap from her, offering her wrist out for him to wrap it. “You are a pain in my ass. How am I gonna explain to mom that we broke the table-” A glass shattering caught the two’s attention, both heads whipping to the entrance to the kitchen to see Susan, wide eyed at a broken dining table with two kids staring wide eyed at her. The glass that shattered was the vase from the living room, flowers and glass all over the floor. Max was up on her feet, Billy following her up, body stiff as he stood beside her. They both immediately started talking at the same time.

“Mom! It was an accident, I was standing on the table and it broke, you know just dorking around when I shouldn’t have- It’s wasn’t Billy’s fault he was just came out here when he heard and was helping me cause I hurt my wrist being stupid-”

“I swear to god it was an accident Susan- I didn’t mean to break it Max and I were just rough housing and trying to take it outside and I jumped over the table and the damn thing just gave out when I was halfway over- I’ll get you another one I promise-”

Susan shushed them both, turning and walking down the hall. Both the blond and redhead looked at eachother, eyes confused and mouths open. They looked up when Susan entered, broom and dustpan in hand, she started sweeping up the vase, she was quiet, the only sound was the glass clattering together as they were swept into the dustpan. 

“Mom..? Are you crying?” With Billy’s help Max stepped over some of the stuff that had fallen to the floor. Rushing over to her mom, Billy on her heels. Susan bent down, picking up the dustpan and standing back up, tears dripping down her cheeks. Billy whined, grabbing the garbage and holding it out for her to dump in, his arm shaking. Susan dumped the broken glass, she moved to lean the broom up against the fridge and set the dust pan on the counter, her hands resting on the counter as she faced away from them. Max looked up at Billy, eye filled with worry. 

“Maybe I should just go, give you two some space.” Billy speaks up, sighs, patting Max on the head before making his way toward the entrance from the kitchen. Max grabbed him by the wrist, yanking him back as best she could. “Max, let go, I’m not gonna go far, I just think she needs some space from me-” 

“You called me mom.” Billy’s eyes went wide, he looked over at Susan, Max could feel him go tense with the realization. “Y-You said, ‘how am I going to explain to mom that we broke the table’. I know you didn’t mean too but I just, I thought Max was lying when she told me you said it a few days ago. I could care less about the table, Neil bought it so, I think it’s fitting you’d be the one to finally get me to get rid of it.” Susan turned, using her finger to swipe away her tears, a small smile on her lips. “I think I was more shocked at seeing you two finally getting along. The mom thing just hit me, and the vase slipped from my fingers. I didn’t mean to startle either of you, or make you uncomfortable Billy.” She sighed, looking down at her hands as they dusted off her pants, a few glass shards falling to the floor. 

“Anyway, I just got back from the post office, they called and said they had something from California, I made a few calls just to make sure the birth certificate was legitimate.” She beckoned them to the living room, Max tugging Billy along to follow. Susan sat on the couch, digging through her purse and pulling out an envelope, she offered it out to Billy. “I think you should open it, I know that you’ve been upset since we found it. Max wasn’t supposed to say anything until we were sure it was legitimate.” Max blushed, hugging Billy’s arm tightly. “So, I think it’s best that you open it.” 

Billy was slow to nod, he moved over to sit by her, taking the envelope and staring at it for a few moments. Max plopped down beside her mom, giving Billy some space. 

“Do you want us to leave? We don’t have to be here for this if you don’t want us too.” Susan whispered, seeing the tremble in the teen’s hand had her worried that being there was putting him on edge. “It’s okay if you want us too, this is about you not us.” 

“No, you can stay. I just, I need a second.” Billy mumbled back in response, his eyes never leaving the envelope. He sighed, leaning back, and dragging a hand through his hair. “I just, I don’t know if I can do this right now. I fell apart again today, I almost- no I did hurt Max. I’m lucky that I had enough sense to stay in my room but what if I had gotten out? What if I had, what if I had killed Max like I did Neil? I can’t fucking do this right now.” He shook his head, looking away from them both. His stomach felt like it was melting all over his insides, like the bile was starting to eat away at his lungs and throat. He flinched feeling something touch his wrist, looking back he saw Susan and Max. Both still there, both with tear stains on their face. In one day he’d made two girls cry, and that is not something he’d ever wanted to do. Especially to them. “I don’t want to hurt either of you any more than I have already.” 

“Then don’t talk to us. Go talk to Steve.” Max piped up, leaning across her mother to paw at Billy’s arm. “Steve will understand, maybe not all of it, but he can try. Steve is a really good listener, and when you’re ready, you can come talk to us if you want.” Both girls looked at him, smiles on their faces, a bit of worry in their eyes.

“I need a smoke.” Billy sighed, getting to his feet, folding the envelope in half he jammed it into one of his pockets. He made his way to the front door, yanking it open the hinges groaned, the top one popping its screws. The blond threw his hands up with a frustrated shout, storming onto the enclosed porch and snagging the pack of smokes from his back pocket. He growled, he couldn’t find his lighter. Looking around the porch for one turned him up empty handed. The nearest thing to throw was a leftover beer can from the night before. He snatched it up, his arm winding back to throw it only for Susan to catch his eye. He paused, arm awkwardly raised and read to throw at the bricking by the front door. 

Susan sighed, holding up a lighter and to his surprise, a pack of Virginia Slims. Billy watched her move to sit down in the deck chair closest to her, he let his arm drop setting the can back on the small round deck table that separated both deck chairs. Even when married to a ‘proper woman’ as Neil had once said, he still liked his distance when enjoying a cup of coffee and the paper on warm mornings. He scoffed, the deck chair creaking as he sat down in it, gently taking the lighter from Susan’s outstretched hand. He pulled out his own dart, sticking it between his lips and lighting it, placing the lighter back on the table as he took a long drag. 

“Didn’t know you smoked.” 

“I did, when I was younger, it was more to just piss off my mom really. Said it wasn’t lady like for a good girl like me to run around stinking of tobacco.” She shrugged, blowing a wisp of smoke up, then flicking the ash off. “I quit when I was pregnant with Max, was going to pick it back up but it never ended up happening.” 

“Until?” 

“That night I watched Neil rip his belt off and beat you.” She didn’t look at him, eyes watching the few cars that slipped past. Some couple across the street was walking their dog. “I smoked through a whole pack, because he’d hit me. Never in my life had a man hit me before. He said that I had no control over your punishment’s because I wasn’t your mother. Said you deserved it, that I didn’t know how bad you could get.” She sighed, sucking down a good portion of the slim, she was about two thirds through it already. Billy was quick to light her up another, holding it out to her and pushing the small ashtray closer. 

“I tried to quit again, when we moved out here. After I saw you offer your’s to Max and she took it. I thought I was setting a bad example for her.” Billy chuckled, shaking his head while he sucked in another drag. Puffing the smoke out in a ring. 

“If anything, you made it clear I was the bad example. Which, you ain’t wrong with that, I was shitty to the both of you.” 

“You had reason to be.” Their eyes met for a split second, Susan snuffed out her first, plucking the second from his hand and popping it between her lips. “To me anyway, I didn’t do much to help you like I should have, and I will regret that til the day I die. I don’t think even God will forgive me for that one.” Billy reached over and grabbed her hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. 

“Don’t worry about him, I’ll kick his ass till he lets you in.” Billy laughed seeing Susan’s face sour, she gently smacked at his hand, he flinched a little, but kept his smile. It was a learned behaviour to flinch at the sound of skin on skin. 

“Billy Hargove you don’t say things like that. You’d better go and walk your butt to the church and apologize for saying such things.” She shook her head, coughing up smoke as she did. “You know I’m serious.” 

“Oh I know, I just don’t think I’d get too far. I’d scare the little old nun’s right back into the cathedral, I’m a man possessed remember?” He sighed, reaching for the ashtray, Susan met him halfway with the dish, allowing him to twist it til it died out. “Toss me one of them girly sticks, I’m out.” He grumbled, surprised to see her sigh and hold out the pack to him. 

“You know, I wasn’t scared that night.” Billy looked up from lighting the slim with a small _‘what’_ making its way around the dart. “When you took care of Neil. I wasn’t scared, not of you. I was scared for you, and for Max.” She reached up, fingers gently rubbing at her own neck. Billy could still see some of the white little scars where Neil had broken the skin. It had him gripping tightly at the lighter, rage starting to boil in his stomach as he remembered. “I thought he was going to kill me. I prayed that I gave you both enough time to get out, and run far away from him.” She sighed, looking over at him with sad eyes. “I felt relieved, when you came back, when you pulled him off of me, but god dammit Billy, when he stabbed you, I couldn’t take it anymore. If you hadn’t killed him, I would have.” The silence that stretched between them was calm, they smoked quietly, Billy fiddling with the lighter and Susan still prodding at her neck. It broke finally when Susan put out her dart, grabbing her pack and placing it in her lap. 

“Billy, I know you won’t hurt us. Me or Max, you didn’t hurt me, even when I pulled you off Neil. You could have easily killed me right there, but you didn’t. Even without eye’s you knew it was me, you were worried, and you just snapped out of it.” Billy didn’t need to look at her to know she was looking at him. He felt it, her gaze on him as he closed his eyes, trying to remember anything after Neil had gone after Susan with the knife he’d stabbed him with. His hand was rubbing at his chest, Neil had apparently nicked his heart. If it hadn’t have been for the healing factor the shadow left over, Billy would have died. Again.

The shake of his arm stopped when he remembered the taste of blood in his mouth, when he opened his eyes he saw Susan, hair a mess and a dark bruise forming on her neck alongside the blood that stained her shirt. He remembered towering over her, standing in something warm and wet, her hand reaching out for his cheek. A familiar gesture. 

_“She was really pretty, and you, you were happy.”_

_“Billy, I’m okay, he can’t hurt us anymore. It’s okay, you can stop now sweetheart.”_

Needless to say it was a long night for the both of them. Not to mention the human mental breakdown he had after, he laughed for hours sitting in an empty dull grey room. Dr. Owens didn't clear him to go home until he balled his eyes out six days later when the therapist asked him how he felt about his dad. When he got home, it was the first time Susan had ever hugged him. 

“I trust you’ll come back when you’re ready?” Billy opened his eyes, looking over at her. She had her legs drawn up into the chair, a hand picking at a loose thread at the bottom cuff. 

“Yeah. I’ll call you when I’m on my way back.” 

“Are you walking or driving?” Billy fiddled with the ring on his middle finger, looking back to the driveway where the Camaro was parked. He’d been cleared to drive for over three months now, he just, couldn’t step into it without remembering Steelworks, and the Shadow. 

“Walking.” Susan nodded, picking the pack of Virginia Slims from her lap and setting it on the table. 

“For the walk, I heard Steve Harrington lives on the outskirts of town.” Susan quirked her eyebrow before getting up and smoothing down her shirt. “If you stay the night you’d better make sure to practice safe sex young man.” Billy’s neck nearly snapped with how quickly his head turned watching Susan open the screen door, his hands gripping at the arm rests of the deck chairs so hard he was sure the wood was cracking under the pressure. The screen door quietly closed, bouncing gently on the door frame, leaving Billy by himself.

This was going to be a very long and confusing day, and it was barely even noon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How are we feeling about this chapter? Please let me know your thoughts! Let's have a conversation!  
> You can find me on Tumblr @Drawing-and-Darknes / on Twitter @DreadnSunflower 18+ Twitter is where I am most active, I run polls for some fics, so if you want to get involved with what I write next follow me there! 
> 
> Hopefully, I can get some more work done on Come&Go as well as Peanut Butter Waffles, haven't read them? Go check them out!
> 
> Comments & Kudos are GREATLY appreciated!


	4. William Ocean Hargrove & Steven Robert Harrington

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Enter in one Steve Harrington, and one awkward Billy Hargrove.
> 
> CHAPTER WARNINGS:  
> Gore? Idk if I would call this gore, it’s like mild gore? Idk Billy eats his own skin though so if you uncomfortable with with people eating skin tread lightly lol.
> 
> Chapter edited on March 12th 2021! Fixed up a few details and some spelling errors, let me know if you find anymore and I’ll fix them :)

Billy stood at the door, hands fidgeting as he contemplated knocking. He knew Steve was home, the Beemer was in the driveway, and there were a lot of lights on in the house. He just didn't know if this was a good idea. What if Steve told him to fuck off? What if Steve straight out just decks him in the face and he loses his shit. Billy really didn’t want to deal with another mental snap and Max would strangle him if he murdered Steve. That would definitely not go over well. 

The blond groaned, dragging his hands down his face. Why was this so damn hard? All he needed to do was apologize, shoot some shit, then leave. Normal boy stuff. Right, simple, easy. He took a deep breath and raised his hand to knock. 

“I can’t do this, I’m gonna kill him.” 

“Uh, why?” Billy practically screamed out in surprise, flinching forward into the door with so much force he heard it crack. “Woah! Sorry I thought you heard me coming up the steps.” He whipped around, blue eyes wide, taking in Steve. He was in basketball shorts, a cream t-shirt, his hair all over the place, and a basketball tucked under his arm. His head was tilted to the side, almost like a dog looking at its owner wondering _where the hell did you throw the ball?_

“I uh- didn’t.” The younger mumbled, cheeks a bit red from the embarrassment of being startled by the other. 

“Yeah no shit dude, you pretty much jumped out of your skin.” Steve chuckled, those brown eyes scrunching up as he did. “What’s up?” The younger couldn’t help but just stare at him, he was a bit put off at how open Steve was being. It was like they had been friends for years or something.

“I was just wondering if you uh, wanted to hang out? Like, with me?” Billy stumbled over his words as he finally managed to get something out. He threw in a small smirk, trying to fall back into his old bravado. Steve smiled, giving an enthusiastic nod. 

“Sure man, let’s head inside, I was gonna order some chinese for lunch. I haven't gone grocery shopping yet, and the kids cleared my pantry out yesterday.” The brunette explained, stepping forward and opening his front door, jerking his head to beckon Billy to follow. They slipped their shoes off at the door, the blond shrugged his jacket off, Steve snagged it and immediately hung it on the coat rack while he nudged the ball over by the shoe rack. “So you're good with chinese?” 

“I’m actually not that hungry-” The words died in his throat as Steve glanced at him with a pointed stare. “Ah, I see Max filled you in on my eating habits.” 

“She talks about it, she’s noticed you don’t eat as much as you used to, you know after the whole...” He grew quiet as his sentence trailed off, eyes averting from Billy’s for a split second. He cleared his throat, “Accident.” 

“You don’t have to do that you know.” The blond rolled his eyes when Steve looked back up with confusion forming on his features. “Look, everyone keeps tiptoeing around the fact that I died. It’s okay, you don’t have to do that, I died, shit happens.” Billy shrugged, trying his best to relax the sudden tension in his shoulders. This got awkward quick. 

“Okay, then I won’t avoid it. How are you doing?” It was Billy’s turn to look confused, he rolled his shoulders until they cracked, the motion helped release some of the mental tension he was holding. He cleared his throat, shifting his weight from one foot to the other as he contemplated the question. 

“Uh, okay I guess.” 

“You said you didn’t want me to dance around it. So I wont, just tell me if I overstep okay?” Steve responded calmly as he leaned against the wall. “Max says you barely talk to them about it, so she's worried. All of the kids are, to be honest with you, Mike still thinks you're flayed.” Steve turned, waving him to follow, Billy scoffed but followed anyway. 

“You all keep saying Flayed, care to fill me in on what that actually fucking means?” They entered the kitchen, the older popping open the fridge grabbing two beers, quickly passing one over to Billy who took it with a nod. 

“Flayed, it’s what happened to you, the Mindflayer flayed you, so it’s like the kid’s version of saying possessed. Taken over. Mind control. Zombie. Whatever makes the most sense to you, that’s what we referred to you and the others as.” 

“And the Mindflayer is the shadow…?” Steve nodded, cracking his beer and taking a sip. He turned and rummaged through one of the drawers closest to the fridge. Fishing out the chinese take out menu and sliding it across the island counter to Billy. “Okay, that makes a bit more sense. Even Owen’s was calling it that. If I’m being completely honest that sounds kinda lame.” He mumbled while looking over the menu. 

“It’s a D&D term, it’s just like how they named the Demogorgon and the Demodogs. So why change it, plus I think you’ll catch on quicker than I did. Half the time the Party would just start gun’s blazing into a conversation and I could barely follow what they were talking about.” Steve shook his head, setting his beer down and pushing himself up to sit on the counter. “So, what do you know? About the Mindflayer, and this whole clusterfuck of a mess you got tangled up in.” 

“Woah hold on, the Demo-what now? There are more things out there like the shadow?” Steve nodded, then shook his head. “What?”

“It’s complicated, Dustin explains this shit way better than I do, but the Demogorgon was the first thing that came through the gate. About three years ago…? It killed Barbra Holland, Nancy’s best friend, in my backyard.” He pointed out the kitchen window to the pool. “Took her right out there, and haven't dipped a foot in the pool since. I’m terrified that the thing will rip a hole right at the bottom and drag me into the Upside Down.” Billy could see him shaking, his fingers gripping the counter. “Anyway, the thing was huge, like eight feet tall or something. I helped Nancy and Johnathan kick the shit out of it.” 

“Wait, three years ago…? This shit has been happening since before I rolled into town?” Steve let out a weak chuckle, nodding. “You would have been what- sixteen? You are telling me right now you were only sixteen when you found out about literal monsters from another dimension actually exist?” Billy gaped at him in awe, jaw practically on the counter while he thought about newly highschooler Steve fighting off a monster. 

“I was seventeen actually, but yeah pretty crazy shit right? That bat that Max almost got you with, remember it?” Billy nodded, his hand instinctively adjusting his balls through his jeans as he remembered how close that thing came to smashing them. “Yeah, Johnathan was the one who made it, I got a few good swings in with it. Not to mention it helped when the Demodogs attacked us.” Steve sighed, a small smile on his lips. He felt badass when he talked about it, but that feeling of anxiety started to creep in the more he tried to remember. 

“Damn, that’s some crazy shit Harrington. Never took you for the monster hunter type.” Steve scoffed as Billy chuckled in between sips of beer. 

“If I’m being honest with you, I only stepped up because of the kids.” Billy’s chuckle died down, the kitchen fell into a short stretch of silence before Steve started up again. “They were in over their heads, so someone had to look after them since they refused to be benched. Damn shitheads almost got me killed. Your sister included, that night at the Byers, now that I think about it I should have just come clean when you asked the first time. It would have given you and Max easy out of all this bullshit, and maybe you wouldn’t have gotten wrapped into it.” Steve looked guilty, his brows furrowed and lips drawn into a frown. “I’m sorry.” 

“For what?” The words came out a little more heated than Billy had meant them. He was pissed that Steve was apologizing for lying to him, when he was the one that was supposed to be apologizing to him for _almost beating him to death._

“For everything I guess, I’m sorry I lied to you, I’m sorry I kept your sister from you, and I’m sorry we never ended up being friends.” Steve shrugged, his eyes looked sad. “Cause if we were, friends, maybe I could have helped you. Maybe I could have helped prevent you getting possessed and skewered to death.” Steve's quiet words made the blond’s guts twist up and turn to stone on his body. He chugged the rest of his beer and crushed it on the counter. 

“Wanna see something?” The words flew out before Billy even processed what he was doing, what could happen if he went through with this. Honestly? _Fuck it._ Steve was making his heart feel things and he felt like his skin was two sizes too small. He needed to stretch, he needed to just let go. Steve was staring at him, brown eyes wide as Billy pointed to the back door. “Can we go outside? I could use some more fresh air.” Steve slowly nodded, slipping off the counter and leading him to the back door. He unlocked it and slid the door open. 

“If you’re jumping in the pool I’m not coming to save you if the Demogorgon rips a hole at the bottom and tries to drag you down.” Steve quipped, eyes full of curiosity as he watched Billy shrug off his jacket and set it on one of the uncovered deck chairs. The blond paused, eyeing the water, then glancing at Steve. “What?”

“You really are afraid of a pool?” Billy raised his eyebrow, taking a few steps forward til he was standing at the edge. 

“It’s more of what happened, so not the pool itself but it’s more of a reminder that Barb is dead. Doesn’t bring me a lot of joy.” Steve shrugged, making his way to stand by the blond. 

“Fair enough. Mind if I dunk my feet in?” The brunette shook his head. Billy quickly leaned down to roll up his pants, then worked on slipping off his boots and socks. He sat back on his ass before letting his feet sink in the water up to his calves. Steve joined him, sitting with his legs cross cross instead of dunking his feet in. 

“What did you want to show me-“ 

“What’s your middle name?” The blond quickly cut in, blue eyes suddenly keen on taking in the pool water. “I know it’s a weird like out of the blue question and it’s legitimately none of my business-“ 

“Hey it’s okay, if this helps in what you want to tell me I have no issue in telling you.” Steve leaned over, knocking his shoulder against Billy’s while tossing him a grin. The blonde huffed, rolling his eyes before nodding. “Alright, it’s Robert. After my Great Grandfather on my mother’s side. She fought tooth and nail against my dad because he wanted it to be Anthony, after him. He was upset I wasn’t Anthony the fourth, and he’d already let her have my first name.” Billy snorted while Steve chuckled and shook his head. “He swears that mom wrote on the birth certificate before I was even born.” 

Billy sighed, glancing over at Steve who was looking at him expectantly. The blond squirmed a bit under his gaze, knowing that some unsaid deal was made moments before. I spill, then you spill, kinda of thing. Harrington had spilled, so now he guessed it was his turn. 

“William Ocean Hargrove. Just found out today.” Billy huffed out, crossing his arms as he kicked one left out sending a small splash out into the middle of the pool. “Here I thought my name was Bill, like what a shitty ass name. It’s right up there with Neil, so I guess I should be thankful it’s William, but like, that doesn’t even sound right.” 

“So, the issue is that your first name doesn’t fit?” 

“Steve, I have a hippy name.” The younger teen deadpanned. Blue eyes meeting brown ones. “Who the fuck gives their kid a middle name like ocean?” Billy glared over at the older as he suddenly burst out into a fit of giggles. “What?” 

“I’m sorry I just- When you said Hippy I thought about you with your mullet except straight hair and a flower crown.” The blond blushed, shoving Steve lamely. “Oh c’mon, next halloween you totally have to do it.” 

“My hair won’t even be long enough for me to do that.” Billy ran a hand through his hair self consciously, his fingers catching on a few tangles he hadn’t taken care of yet. 

“Well it’s pretty long now on the top, you’ve just got to let the sides grow out. Plus it’s May, you’ve got tons of time to grow it out.” Steve grinned, shoving the blond back playfully. “Also what the fuck is going on with your hair, half of it is all straight and the other half is curly?” Steve watched as the younger slumped a little bit. “Hargrove c’mon, it’s just hair, it will grow back and soon enough you’ll have your mullet back. I know you didn’t have a choice, but it can still look good, you just have to take care of it like you did when it was longer.” Steve watched Billy nod slowly, the blond wasn’t really listening, his mind starting to drift. 

“How are you doing with that anyway…? I know your body has changed a lot since Starcourt. The hair, your chest…” the brunette trailed off, trying to let the younger decide if this was an okay topic.

“Has Max told you anything?” His voice was barely a whisper, blue eyes darting over to Steve. “About, that…?” 

“No, I haven’t heard much to be honest. Nor was it really my place to ask considering we aren’t close.” 

“Can I show you? I haven’t really shown anyone, I’m scared it will freak out Susan and Max.” 

“That’s fine.” Steve felt his stomach drop, the hairs on the back of his neck slowly stood up. That feeling in his stomach grew as he watched the blond start to take his shirt off, the fabric sliding smoothly over his lower back. Exposing the tanned flesh of his lower back. As it slowly glided up Steve’s eyes widened, he wanted to look away but couldn’t. The scars on his sides expanded a bit onto his back, the flesh a mix of purple, red and black. It was like lumpy necrosis rotting tissue settled on top of tanned skin in a firework like pattern. A large burst in the middle, then it splattered out across his ribcage. 

Blue eyes didn’t meet brown as he turned around. Showing off the worst of it. Steve let out a strangled gasp, eyes roaming over the blonds chest. The scar like a blooming flower between his pectoral muscles, ugly roots snaking across his skin. Both sides of his ribcage looked a bit odd, as if something had squeezed him so hard his ribs curved in. He remembered that something had, the Mindflayer’s clawed appendages gripping into both of the younger’s sides, it most likely broke ribs. Steve didn’t know what to say, his lips parted, eyes unable to rip away. 

“Billy, I…” Steve tried, he really did, but the night flooded back to him, like a dam bursting. “Jesus.” He managed to choke the word out, slowly sinking down onto the edge of the patio chair as he watched Billy fiddle with his shirt. 

“It’s fine, I uh, don’t mind it much anymore. Battle scars right?” Billy gave a half-assed smile, his eyes still on his shirt as he unwrapped it from his hand, then rewrapped it in an endless cycle of fiddling. “I heard the chicks here dig it.” The younger didn’t sound so sure of himself, his eyes still avoiding the olders. 

“Billy, what’s actually going on here…?” 

“Just, don’t scream and uh,” Billy quickly fished around in his pockets, pulling out the folded up birth certificate. He stared hard at it before closing the space between them and holding it out to the brunette. “Keep this safe for me please.”

“Scream? Billy what the fuck-“ Steve glanced down at the small folded up paper, gently taking it and watching the blond back up, his hands unbuckling his belt, then popping the button in his jeans. “Dude, I’ve seen your dick before and as much as I’d love to compare dick sizes, they way you’re going about this is freaking me the fuck out.” Steve nervously thumbed at the paper, eyes wide as Billy stepped out of his jeans, hands covering his crotch. Eyes staring down at the pool, avoiding Steve’s stare. 

“Steve, I’m sorry, for being a prick to you, for fucking up your social life, for beating the shit out of you that night.” The blond felt the familiar feeling of cold in his chest. Right under that lumpy tight mass of scar tissue that nestled in between his pecs. The cold felt like the first few moments of an IV drip, instead of warming and his body adjusting, the feeling only got colder. After Neil, Billy welcomed it. He didn’t bother fighting it. “I’m just, sorry for everything.” 

The blond finally looked up, the corners of his lips turning upwards as he met Steve’s wide gaze. He could see the gears turning in his head, watching him take a step back, watching his features go from confusion and slowly morph into horror. Billy sighed, letting his eyes roll back as the cold creeped over his shoulders and down his arms. It was as if he was leaning back into fluffy snow, a soft cold hug, the freeing feeling of his skin finally splitting open. His muscles pulsing as something stretched from inside him. Bones cracking, a feeling of relief left behind as they cracked back into place.   
  


* * *

Steve felt like he was going to piss himself, mind trying to catch up as those familiar black veins snakes out over skin then splitting open. Tan skin sloughing off, falling to the ground with a sickening squelch. The grinding of bone was deafening alongside the _splat_ of skin falling off. _Billy’s skin was fucking falling off._ Revealing ridged black grey muscles that undulated as whatever horror from the upside down ripped straight out of Billy Hargrove. His knees trembled as he watched clawed hands thicken and reach up, brushing through Billy’s hair taking chunks of curls and scalp with the motion. His breath was caught in his chest as he watched Hargroves face split, in a familiar petal like fashion. He didn’t get the chance to see those petals fully stretch open, or the rest of the thing form, because he turned and bolted. 

Steve Harrington ran with everything he had, leg muscles protesting as he scrambled through the french doors. He flung the door closed, locking it in a growing panic as he saw the hulking thing stretch its thick long limbs out. Billy’s skin— _his fucking skin was in piles_ at the creatures feet. He scrambled up the stairs, he felt like he was going to throw up because _it was going to get him— it was going to climb up the stairs, find him and drag him to a watery grave like the Demogorgon had done to Barbra Holland._

He didn’t even remember throwing himself into his room, pushing the dresser in front of the window, and taking his desk chair and jamming it under the door handle. He didn’t remember grabbing his bat from the closet and sitting at the bottom of his bed. Back pressed against it and eyes darting between the window and the door. The bat in his right hand, tiny folded up paper in his left. His chest heaving, vision blurry, legs wound tight and ready to spring up at any moment. Steve was ready, he was ready if that thing came after him. He would go out fighting- he’d get in as many hits as he could- he’d- he’d- 

He needed to calm down first. Steve let his eyes slip close, pulling as much logic as he could out of the panic haze his brain was in. _Billy turned into a fucking demogorgon like thing. Billy Hargrove, just had all of his skin fall off and a demogorgon hybrid stood in his place._ Steve glanced down at the paper in his hand, he wondered why it was important that he held it for Billy. Not that it mattered now, the blond was gone, reduced to nothing but a puddle of blood and skin chunks by the side of his fucking pool. Just when he thought he was starting to get used to the fact Barb died in his pool, Billy died _again_ by the side of it by some gruesome twist of fate. 

Steve felt like he was going to puke up his guts all over the floor. How in the hell was he going to explain that another young teen died by his pool, _again._ Who could he call? He didn’t want the kids getting involved, but they seemed like his only real option. The radio Dustin had given him was somewhere in the room with him, his only real way of communication, and Steve was most certainly not stepping foot out of his room to go downstairs or in his parents room to get the landline and call Nancy. He was fucked, and he was going to drag the kids into another sloppy mess of saving Hawkins— 

“Steve? Hello anyone home?” He choked on his spit from shooting up so fast. While coughing, his hands fumbled around his mess of blankets on his bed in search of the radio that had crackled loudly to life. He needed to turn the damn thing down, “Steve! Please come in, this is kind of urgent!” He snagged it out from under his pillow, turning the volume knob down to low as Max continued to yell into the receiver on her end.

“Steve!”

“Max keep your voice down! You’re going to get me killed, now isn’t the best time—“ Steve managed to string together a clear sentence, heart hammering away in his chest as his gaze snapped from the door to the window, back and forth. Searching for any signs that the monster was nearby. 

“Is Billy there with you?” His grip on the bat tightened as her voice crackled through the radio speaker. He could hear the familiar panic in her voice. “He said he would call us when he got to your place, but we haven’t heard anything. Have you seen him? Please tell me you’ve seen him and he’s there with you. Mom and I are worried that he ran off or fucking monstered out again—“ 

“Wait— did you just say _monster out?”_ That was it, Steve was going to go insane. He was already on the tail end of a panic attack, the bat clattered to the floor as he slumped back onto his bed. “Max, did you forget to mention that Billy could turn into a demogorgon, or was I just supposed to watch his skin fall off myself?” Steve snapped into the receiver, his fingers shaking he gripped the radio so tight. “ _Max Mayfield, what the hell is going on with your brother?”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How are we feeling about this chapter? Please let me know your thoughts! Let's have a conversation!  
> You can find me on Tumblr @Drawing-and-Darknes / on Twitter @DreadnSunflower 18+ Twitter is where I am most active, I run polls for some fics, so if you want to get involved with what I write next follow me there! 
> 
> Hopefully, I can get some more work done on Come&Go as well as Peanut Butter Waffles, haven't read them? Go check them out!
> 
> Comments & Kudos are GREATLY appreciated!


	5. Give a Guy a Warning Next Time.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Billy takes some much needed time thinking about what’s happening. 
> 
> Steve comes to his senses. That or he’s walking straight into his death. 
> 
> CHAPTER WARNINGS:  
> Skin eating, mentions of character death, character death, descriptions of character death.
> 
> Chapter edited on March 12th 2021! Fixed up a few details and some spelling errors, let me know if you find anymore and I’ll fix them :)

Billy growled, sniffing at the piles of skin at his feet, claws poking at the rapidly decaying flesh. It smelt wrong, not edible, the sour scent making him think of an ugly colour of yellow and brown. He snorted, the edges of his face stretching out so he could lick the chunks up. No use in leaving it, extra protein right? It was weird, chewing on his own flesh like it was soft, wet, jerky. It tasted surprisingly good, satisfying, and made him less jumpy for whatever odd reason. Maybe it was just the mouth feel, like chewing gum and really enjoying the flavour during class hours. 

Once finished, Billy came back from his thoughts to find himself dragging his tongue along the concrete. The chlorine and blood mixed as good as a vodka tonic, not his favourite, but something tolerable. He knew Steve was gone, the fear that soured the air and grew fainter and fainter with every passing moment made his heart twist up. He figured it was a fifty fifty chance that the older teen would freak out, Billy saw a chance and took it. For what reason he didn’t really know, he’d come to apologize to him, not rip free of his too tight skin and tower over the pool like a creep. 

His jaws snapped together, teeth clicking, his petal face pieces twitching as he sniffed around. The chlorine taking up most of his nose’s attention, it had a sweet but sour scent. Made his mouth water slightly, his claws twitching closer to the edge. Billy let into the urge, slipping into the water, letting it consume his heavy body, carrying it gently to the bottom. It was like floating in a black abyss, sightless, surrounded by a sweet but sickly smell, wrapped up tightly by a force he couldn’t control. It was oddly comforting, he felt like this should make him panic, but it didn’t. 

After Neil, things changed. It was the first time he stretched out, fully stretched, and it was relieving just to stretch and zone out. Let the world spin on and take control while he just sat back and let his eyes close. He was afraid to admit that it wasn’t the fact he didn’t remember killing Neil that scared him, it was the fact he remembered all of it. Every single moment. Dragging him by his leg out the back door, his jaws clamping down so hard he remembered feeling Neil’s bone crack under the pressure. He remembered the satisfaction he felt as ribbons of Neil’s skin joined the blood soaked grass. He flexed his claw tipped fingers, remembering how nicely his knuckles flattened Neil’s skull. The crunch of thick bone ringing out as he positioned his fist back and forth. 

Billy was afraid to admit in the moment, he almost didn’t open his eyes. He almost let himself sink to the bottom, never to open his eyes again, never to worry about anything because he was a fucking monster. Billy Hargrove had accepted the fact that he was a monster as he smashed his fathers face to the point it was behind recognition. He was ready to bolt after realizing Neil had stopped breathing, his heartbeat had silenced, leaving Billy heaving and claws flexing as everything started to stretch out more. As his jaw opened wide, ready to consume, leave behind nothing but crimson grass that would be washed clean from the rain. 

It was the smell that brought him back, the smell of concern, worry, mixed with apple spice and cinnamon. That had him open his eyes into that same dark abyss, the realization coming crashing down on him as that smell filled his senses over the stench of Neil’s blood. He remembered towering over that smell, and the warmth that touched him, that distracted him from taking off into the Hawkin’s forests.

_“It’s okay sweetheart, you can stop now.”_

Susan was the one that brought him back, that saved him in some odd way. He was grateful for her, for the first time in his life since meeting here, that night was the first night he started looking at her like she was a mother. One that could maybe help ease the pain he felt about his birth mom. It was odd, had he thought about that a few years prior he would have laughed. 

_Susan? My mom? Yeah fucking right._

Now, Billy wasn’t so sure. It had felt natural to call her mom, like he did earlier, it was the first time since July, back when the shadow had taken him, that he’d felt a comforting warmth envelope him. Talking with her on the porch, laughing with her, her scolding him, her just being there with him. She’d really stepped up, claimed him as her own and here he was, a monster, just like the shadow, she’d seen him rip Neil into nothing, and she still chose to try and comfort him. She fought to get him back out of Owen's custody and Susan Mayfield won. 

He sighed, the water that flowed into his mouth felt nice, oddly filling. He could feel his extra face appendages floating, the petals swaying with the settling water, it felt nice, not to be as heavy, to feel about as weightless and empty like he did above water. His therapist, Pam, would frown at that, he trilled at the thought of her thin lips pressing together, her green eyes calm, but sad. Pam would tell him to stop sulking, apparently he did that alot, and it was unattractive and childish to do so. Billy didn’t seem much wrong with it, sometimes you just needed to sulk and be angry. 

_“Billy, sulking is a way of closing yourself off, same with your outbursts of anger. When you close yourself off from the people you want to understand you all of those emotions build up, then for you they all come out in an explosion of anger. You just need to learn how to talk, to not drop bombs on people and just try and talk to them.”_

He growled, sending up a stream of bubbles around him as his claws scraped at the pool tiles. Pam annoyed him to no end, here he was trying to talk to Steve, do what she asked, just open his mouth and talk and it came back and bit him in the ass. 

_“Billy Hargove, turning into a monster in front of a boy who has been through three years of monster related trauma is most certainly not what I meant.”_

Billy could hear her shrill annoyed voice now, it maybe wasn’t his best idea. He was tired of this, all of it, everyone danced around the fact he’d died All of them except for Steve, and that was because Billy told him not to. Billy told him, and Steve didn’t and now Billy is sitting at the bottom of Steve Harrington’s stupid pool sulking because he jumped the gun and decided to monster out in front of Steve and Steve was long gone by now, probably rounding up Nancy and Johnathan to come drag him out of the pool and kill him because Billy was a monster and-

“Billy?” Steve gripped his bat tightly, eyes wide as he looked around the patio. No fleshy glowing portals, no prowling demodogs, no MindFlayer crawling out of the trees to attack him. Just the deck chairs, and the pool which lights flickered every so often. He slowly made his way closer, looking around, on high alert as his body was still shaking and begging him to turn tail and run back into the house. Max told him not to be scared, that it was just Billy, just, in an upside down monster form that Max didn’t think was important enough to let anyone know about. 

“Billy, you still here man? Max called, her and Susan are worried about you.” Steve sighs, he’s sure that the blond-now-monster is still lurking around somewhere in his backyard, and he really didn’t want to look in the shed. Even before the whole upside down fiasco bullshit happened, that shed was just weird and ominous in general. He also doubted Billy could smash himself in the thing without splitting it open, which meant the only place left was probably the pool, or Billy had hightailed it into the forest and- wait, wasn’t that blood stain supposed to be the pile of Billy’s skin that had fallen off? 

“Billy now would be the time to come out and not scare the shit out of me because at this point I think I’ll drop from a fucking heartattack.” Steve slowly made his way toward the pool, avoiding the patch of concrete that was stained a dark crimson. His eyes lingered on the stained concrete, his fingers curling tightly around the bad handle. He turned, looking back at the his house, wondering if it was still okay to just turn back now and give up. Would Billy even recognize him? Would Billy just rip him into tiny little shreds then swallow him up? What was he supposed to do if Billy was gone? Go looking for a ten foot monster in the Hawkins woods? Yeah right, like Steve could step foot in the forest by himself, one wrong cast shadow or snapping twig would send his fight or flight response off and he’d bolt. Hell, what if Billy was on the prowl for human flesh? What if-? 

Steve blinks as something hits his hair, he reaches up to see, fingers gently brushing through the tangled brown locks. He must have zoned out while going through his _what if_ list. His hand brushed through something wet, some of it felt like water, other parts felt thicker and sticky— kinda like drool. The brunette paused at the thought, a small smirk starting to bloom on his lips as he took in a deep breath, then slowly let it out. Steve slowly tilts his head up, eyes going wide as his head cranes back further to take in the hulking figure that was not hovering over him. Those familiar face petals seemed less scary and more intriguing now that he knew that odd looking elongated skull that sat in the center of those toothy petals belonged to Billy and not another fucked up minion of the MindFlayer.

“Hey Hargove, glad to see you’re still here and not off eating people’s cats or something.” Steve flinched as the blond-now-monster snorted, sending more droplets of pool water and strings of drool down on his face. Steve huffs and drags a hand over his cheek, flinging off the wetness. “Watch it man, your drool could be like acid or something.” He spun on his heels, now facing toward the pool as he watched the creature heave itself out of the pool, it’s claws scraping against concrete leaving shallow grooves behind. The brunette reminded himself that this wasn't an _it,_ this was Billy, just, different. Dustin would definitely be a good person to have around at the moment. He’d probably be nerding out about how Billy has a freaky monster form and a perfect back story to be some kind of villain.

A deep growl pulled Steve from his thoughts, he shook his head to clear his train of thought, to focus on the situation at hand. Here he was, bat in hand, standing in nothing but a shirt and basketball shorts, quite literally surrounded by Billy Hargove. Who, in a strange turn of events can apparently turn into a ten foot something monster with a handful of terrifying features that reminded Steve of what a hell the last three, almost four years had been. Though, with a closer look, Billy somehow looked like a creature from a different dimension, well, technically he was now, but Steve wouldn’t have thought he was from the Upside Down. His body was sleeker, not as lumpy as the Mindflayer was. The skin was a dark black, spots where his scars stood out due to their mulberry purple red coloration. His eyes wandered up to the bone white skull that stared down at him, the tooth lined petals framing it just like a flower. It looked like some type of dog skull with a mix of human and jagged teeth, parts of the skull were covered in the same purple red flesh that the inside petals were composed of, as if they at one point were attached to the skull itself. Steve glanced down, his grip tightening on the bat as something bumped into it. _Billy had another fucking pair of arms._

“Dude, I’m not going to lie, this is fucking _crazy_.” Steve looked back up and threw a grin up at him, only for the brunette to notice and make the connection. “Oh shit, you don’t have eyes. What the fuck, can you even see me?” Steve waved his hand teasingly in front of Billy’s snout while chuckling. “That must suck, not being able to see- HEY!” He jumped hearing the loud clack of Billy’s teeth as he lunged forward to snap at his fingers. The bat toppled to the ground, and Steve as clumsy as ever manages to somehow trip over it and fall back. He shouts in at a sudden pain in his shoulder, closing his eyes right expecting to hit the concrete. 

After a few moments he slowly cracks open one eye, looking around he finds himself held steady by his arm. One of Billy’s giant taloned hands, the wide palm of his hand wrapped easily around Steve’s forearm. All his weight was suddenly put onto his shoulder from falling, it aches in protest as the brunette steady’s himself back on his feet. Billy doesn’t let go, but his grip starts to loosen. 

“Thanks.” He gets a puff of air blown in his face and a snap of teeth in return. “Sorry I booked it, you just scared the fuck out of me. Give a guy a warning next time instead of just stripping off clothes. I went full panic mode.” Steve sighs, gently tugging his arm free. Billy huffs, letting a growl bubble up out of his throat, he supposed it was time to let the brunette's arm go.

“Does it hurt…? When your skin falls off?” Billy shakes his head, “Have you told anyone else, besides Max and her mom?” Another head shake. “How long has it been, since this has been happening?” Steve assumes that the head duck and twitch of shoulders is a shrug. He sighs, running a hand through his hair. Billy growls, claws clicking against the concrete as he stalks toward the house. It’s odd, watching him on all fours- well six technically, cross the distance, then turn back to look at him as if to say _you coming or what Harrington?_

“You are damn lucky my mom just had the contractor instal French doors.” Steve huffs as he jogs to catch up with the creature, shooing him back to get to the doors. The brunette couldn’t help but snicker at the thought of him shooing an inter dimensional creature that could rip his head off, let alone shooing Billy Hargrove. Who could also rip his head off, he isn’t quite sure which he’d rather go with if he actually had a choice. He fiddles with the second door lock near the top, listening for the click. It was awkward, Steve standing quietly fiddling with the door lock, while Billy hovered silently. A soft click finally sounded after what felt like ten minutes had dragged by, Steve almost said fuck it and let the younger just rip the damn door off. He felt like an idiot for taking so long, but nothing he could do about it now besides push it open. 

He watched the creature duck down and wiggle his way in, shoulder hitting the chandelier causing it to swing back and forth. Billy clicked his jaw, hunkering down more and sulking his way into the living room where he could spread out and flop down on the floor. The china cabinet shook, plates and bowls rattling softly for a moment before quieting down. Steve leaned against the entrance way to the wall, watching as Billy lumbered around like a dog till he managed to find a comfortable position. Which happened to be curled around the coffee table like a giant snake, head resting on the far side of the couch two of those tooth filled petals acting like a pillow for the skull. With one big sigh the other three sagging alongside the rest of Billy’s body sagged with the exhale. 

“Tired?” A tail flick was the only response he got before it snaked around his calf and knee, gently tugging him away from the wall. Steve sighed, giving in and letting the tail tug him closer. “It’s okay man, just sleep for a bit okay? You’re safe here, not to mention when you wake up there will probably be chinese food.” Steve felt like he was just talking out loud, Billy might have been already asleep for all he knew. Though, the grip on his leg didn’t loosen even as the rise and fall of its chest evened out. He sighed. 

After a few moments of struggling to free his leg and gently setting Billy’s tail down- which in retrospect he never thought he’d need to gently set anyone’s tail down in order not to wake them, but then again Hargrove did just turn into an inter dimensional monster by his pool and Steve let him in the house- to try and avoid disturbing him. Steve decided his life was just going to be weird. Probably until he died, and somehow, looking at Billy Hargrove- whose full name happened to have the word Ocean in it- as a ten foot tall weird looking Demogorgon hybrid of some sort that was sprawled out in his living room and dozing peacefully, he was perfectly okay with that.

**Author's Note:**

> How are we feeling about this chapter? Please let me know your thoughts! Let's have a conversation!  
> You can find me on Tumblr @Drawing-and-Darknes / on Twitter @DreadnSunflower 18+ Twitter is where I am most active, I run polls for some fics, so if you want to get involved with what I write next follow me there! 
> 
> Hopefully, I can get some more work done on Come&Go as well as Peanut Butter Waffles, haven't read them? Go check them out!
> 
> Comments & Kudos are GREATLY appreciated!


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